I’m lucky to have a job that will enable me the flexibility to be at home with the kids and be able to do some work from home once they are born. I know that not all dads have jobs that would give them that flexibility. And so while I’m not going to be a full-time stay-at-home dad, I feel like I will have some taste of what that might be like.
Since I’ve started this blog, I’ve been connecting with some other daddybloggers, and many of them are stay-at-home dads. I have nothing but respect for these men who are able to make a commitment to be so involved in the lives of their kids. I know for some, it’s not their choice, but have been put in that place because of losing a job, etc. But I know that there are others who have made a conscious decision to stay at home and be the full-time homemaker while their wives or partners are working.
And to those of you who do that – I think that’s awesome. Unlike the absolutely ridiculous and un-Christian thoughts from Mark Driscoll in the above video, I think you’ve got to be a pretty courageous man to stay at home and raise your children. You’re doing something that many men like Driscoll simply don’t have the cojones or chutzpah to pull off. Speaking of Mark Driscoll raising his kids, you have to laugh at the point in the above video when his wife basically says that it’s a good thing that Mark ISN’T the one who is staying home with the kids. Can you imagine…?
I don’t know how many of you have seen the above video clip from Mars Hill Church – but I hope you know that it is a minority opinion within Christianity. We don’t all buy into that old-school close-minded approach that thinks women are built to be in the homes. Or that a Christian man who isn’t providing for his family is worse than an unbeliever. Seriously? Seriously? Who are these people?
Oh that’s right – “Bible-believing” Christians – Christians who are living according to “biblical principles.” Great. Alright – well, have fun living according to biblical principles while the rest of us will go on living in the 21st century.
If I had a dime for everytime someone referenced this clip. I think first it would be good to listen to the context of the message he had given before that q/a.
Because it is a completely bizarre statement I choose to just think Mark messed up and leave it at that rather than draw more attention to it. It’s sad to me that we’re so quick to start throwing Mark under the bus. Why not spend time focused on the absent dads who are ruining the lives of their children?
I get the frustration with this video and all, I just wonder if drawing more attention to it is doing more harm or good.
Tyler – like you said, I haven’t listened to the message that preceded this, but I don’t think it’s really that people throw Mark under a bus…
It’s more like he just purposely goes and lays down in the middle of a bus lane….he just asks for it with crap like this.
Drawing more attention to it is probably not all that helpful – and I try and forget about Driscoll for the most part, but sometimes the stuff he says just really gets under my skin….
Fair enough. And I know your blogging well enough to know you don’t have bones to pick with people. I’ve just heard this video referenced a lot over the past year. Thanks for the reply.
I think it’s important for there to be as many “Not all Christians think this way” messages as possible in response to stuff like Driscoll’s, so thanks Adam for saying what you think. (And what I think, for that matter)
I’m proud of what I do as a stay-at-home dad, I feel like its one of the greatest adventures I’ve ever been able to undertake, and I’m DOUBLY proud that what I do enables my ordained wife to live out her call helping Louisville Seminary produce a whole bunch of other people equipped to pursue THEIR calls.
I am the pastor of a small rural church in Idaho. When I was asked to step in to the pastorate at the ripe old age of 25 in 2006, the church was in severe financial straits, and so after a period of a few months, I actually went to the leaders and asked to be given a pay cut. They agreed, and I began taking home $500 a month. Fortunately, the church was in a place where they owned both the building and a house out right (both really old) so my wife and I had a place to stay. Unfortunately, because of the financial hardship, I have never had insurance through the church or been able to afford it, so my wife had to get a job that would provide it for her. I also took on another job as well, because we were paying off school loans and what not. Eventually, my wife became pregnant, and during that time I also started an online MDiv. program. The obvious, most beneficial, most providential thing for the family was for me to drop the additional job, stay home and plan meetings and other things around my wife’s schedule. It has been amazing, I’ve loved every minute of it. However, my wife DOES really want to stay at home. Unfortunately, for the time, it’s not in the cards (if we want insurance, which is a nice thing to have when you have a child). Until it is feasible, the best that I can do in terms of providing for the family and still answer what I feel God is calling me to do ministry wise is exactly what we are doing. Wonder what Mark would say to that?
I think Driscoll can go a little over the top. But you also have to keep in mind his church is full of a lot of 30 year old guys who still live at home and refuse to get a job. He has to come hard sometimes because of the context he’s pastoring in.
Regarding your last statement…
“Oh that’s right – “Bible-believing” Christians – Christians who are living according to “biblical principles.” Great. Alright – well, have fun living according to biblical principles while the rest of us will go on living in the 21st century.”
What’s the measuring stick if it isn’t biblical principles? Is it just cultural movement and progress? Doesn’t sound Christian at all actually… sounds like staying on par with the culture is the driver for behavior.